First Comes Marriage…

What better time to shop inside a Babies R’ Us for the first time than during the holiday season?

I received word Tuesday afternoon that one of my co-worker’s wives was being induced within a few hours. “Crap. I really need to get his gift now,” I thought.

So after work my boyfriend and I made the trek two days before Christmas to one of the busiest parts of Reno.

First, we made our way to dinner – duh – but after seeing the line inside Red Robin, I suggested we get the gift then come back.

Getting out his Explorer, we immediately noticed several ‘expectant mother’ parking signs. “Oh, that’s nice.” I had no idea they even existed and commented whoever came up with that concept was genius.

Once the front doors slid behind us, I turned into a deer caught in headlights. Who knew this world even existed?

I took a guess of where I wanted to go, luckily found my gift then spied a comparative yet possibly better one. “What do you think? Should we get this one instead?”

“It’s up to you. What do you think?”

“It’s from the both of us. You’re not helping me.”

Finally I decided to go with my first choice – a medical-like survival kit for newborns – then walked back to the front entrance until I got distracted again – this time by the massive car seat/stroller section.  

“Oh my God. Look at all this. That’s one thing that is recession proof – babies. They’re always a supply of them.”

How do you decipher which car seat to get? They all look alike. I can only imagine the stress level induced by indecisive parents!

That will not be something I look forward to. And to make it worse, (if and) when I do have children years from now, they will be an even wider selection of gadgets to choose from. Lord help me.

Passing by several aisles of mini-me clothes and shoes, we finally make our way to the toys section where even more agonizing choices lie ahead for us.

Thank God most of the items I looked at we’re too old for a newborn so they were immediately eliminated by default.

Then I found it – a Santa rattler with the words ‘Baby’s First Christmas’ sewn into the felt. “It counts!” I exclaim to him.

He looked at me indifferent while exclaimed with joy. The woman clerk even stared then pushed a digital frame on me. “It holds 100 pictures.”

“Oh God no.”

“It does kind of sound cool,” my boyfriend replied. I didn’t go for it – what happens if the frame malfunctions? I’m old-fashioned; I enjoy clasping photos in my hand, not through a glass case.

I go to stand in line and wait.

“She’ll take you over there,” the store associate says.  

I didn’t hear.

“She’ll help you over there,” she repeats.

“Oh sorry, I was easily distracted by the mini animal crackers,” I quipped.

Unknowingly, more options lie ahead. “Are these for a registry?”

I look at Sterling. “I didn’t even know they have them here.”

“I have no idea. Can you tell we’ve never been here before.”

Sterling walks around the corner to check on the registry machine. “Nope.” Then it occurred to me why didn’t they set up a baby registry? Maybe they didn’t know either!

I felt so out of place in there. I was never into children that much (maybe since I’m an only child?) and now that I’m old as Jesus I still don’t want any.

My parents aren’t pushing me for grandchildren (which I’m very thankful.) I already have a handful with four twitball kitties at home.

Still, I’m not looking forward to that day. “So what car seat did you decide on?”